As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases — at no extra cost to you.

Purchasing anything through my links keeps this one-man operation rolling. Thank you for your support.

25 Wheelie Lame Cycling Jokes (That’ll Make You Pedal Away Groaning)

By Bruce | The Old Guy Bicycle Dude

Let’s face it — sometimes you just need a laugh. Or at least a groan. If you’ve been riding long enough, you’ve already heard some clunkers. But these? These are next-level lame.

They’re bad. They’re punny. And they might just make your helmet fly off from secondhand embarrassment.

So grab your handlebars and brace yourself — here come 25 cycling jokes that are so bad, you’ll be telling them to your ride buddies tomorrow anyway.


🚲 Why did the cyclist get an F in grammar?
He was terrible at puncture-ation.

🚲 What did the wheel say when it was having a bad day?
I’m wheel-y stressed!

🚲 When the bike made an inappropriate joke…
He quickly backpedaled.

🚲 Why are off-road bikes so shy?
They’re intro-dirts.

🚲 My bike’s not getting out of bed.
It’s tyred and feeling flat.
Pro tip: a mini inflator saves the day faster than a punchline.

🚲 The bike was crushing it at the roulette table.
It was on a roll.

🚲 A cyclist rode past me without making a sound.
I couldn’t bell-ieve it.

🔔 A Bell That Deserves a Punchline

Small, sturdy, and surprisingly loud — the Greallthy Bike Bell makes sure your jokes land and pedestrians hear you coming.

See on Amazon

🚲 I saw someone with one eye riding a bike.
I think it was a cycle-ops.

🚲 Cyclists and inmates have something in common:
They’re both behind bars.

🚲 I broke my bike today.
Now I have to fork out cash for a new one.

🚲 I can’t find the best way to hold my handlebars.
I really need to get a grip.

🚲 Someone dissed cycling.
So I spoke up right away.

🌙 Be Seen from Every Angle

Snap-on spoke reflectors shine from all sides — the cheap upgrade that keeps you glowing after dark. 

See on Amazon
Want the full visibility playbook instead? Read my Top Cycling Visibility Tips for Riding in Traffic and Low Light.

🚲 I ride my bike multiple times a day.
It’s time to break the cycle.

🚲 I avoid bike trails at night.
They’re full of cycle paths.

🚲 My bike hits me, then I hit back.
It’s a vicious cycle.

🚲 You can learn about bikes in an...
en-cycle-opedia.

🚲 I need to take a...
brake.

Serious for a sec: wondering if short daily rides actually move the scale? Here’s my no-BS take — Is 30 Minutes of Cycling a Day Enough to Lose Weight?

🚲 I bike on both coasts.

You could say I’m bike-oastal.

🚲 A cyclist without a bike is...
saddle the time.

🚲 I was going to tell a joke about cyclists…
But I didn’t want to wheelie offend anyone.

🚲 How did the bike keep fit?
It joined a spin class.

🚲 My bike fell in love with the road.
It’s head-over-wheels.

🚲 I just got a brand new bike.
It’s off the chain!

🚲 Why didn’t the bike stand up by itself?
It was two tyre’d.

🚲 Why can’t elephants ride bikes?
They don’t have thumbs to ring the bell.


🎁 Funny Bike Gifts That Actually Exist

You made it through all 25 jokes — now here are a few gag-worthy cycling items that might get more laughs than the puns above:

As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.

Updated October 3, 2025

Comments

Safety First

The Rearview Mirror That Saved My Life

I’ve used this Bike Peddler Take-A-Look mirror on every ride since 2014. Glass (not wobbly plastic), quick glance, and cars don’t sneak up on you. If you buy one cycling upgrade this year, make it this.

  • Clips to glasses or helmet—fits anyone
  • Stable, adjustable arm; clear wide view
  • Low-cost safety upgrade that actually gets used
See it on Amazon
As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases — at no extra cost to you.

Subscribe