Showing posts with the label Cycling humor

Even Cyclists Have Bad Days

Even Cyclists Have Bad Days: Tales from the Two-Wheeled Underworld Ah, cycling. The wind in your hair, the sun on your face, the smug satisfaction of leaving all those car fumes in your dust (okay, maybe not all of them). It's like therapy on two wheels, right? WRONG. Because even us lycra-clad warriors of the road have our off days. Days where the universe seems to be personally conspiring against our spokes, and the only scenery we see is the inside of a ditch. Exhibit A: The Great Chain Debacle You're cruising along, feeling like Lance Armstrong reincarnated. Then, CLANG . Your bike shudders, your pedal goes rogue, and suddenly you're standing there like a confused flamingo, chain wrapped around your ankles like a vengeful serpent. Pro tip: Grease is your friend. And invest in a multi-tool, because let's be honest, you'll need it. Exhibit B: The Weather Warfare You wake up, birds are chirping, sky is blue. Perfect cycling weather, right? Wrong again. By the time

Donald Trump Will Never Win the Tour de France But He Will Probably Claim He Did

Donald Trump is known for many things, but being a world-class cyclist is not one of them. In fact, it's safe to say that Trump would never win the Tour de France. But that doesn't mean he won't claim he did. Why Trump Will Never Win the Tour de France: There are a few reasons why Trump will never win the Tour de France. First, he's not in good enough shape. Trump is overweight and out of shape, and he doesn't seem to be interested in getting in shape. Second, Trump doesn't have the right training. Cycling is a grueling sport, and it requires years of training to compete at the highest level. Trump has never undergone any serious cycling training. Third, Trump doesn't have the right mental toughness. Cycling is a very demanding sport, both physically and mentally. Trump is known for having a thin skin and a short temper. It's unlikely that he would be able to handle the pressure of competing in the Tour de France. Why Trump Will Probably Claim He Did: De